He's A Crazy Cinephile
On Maestro, movie stars, and reining it in
This past Sunday, mere hours before the 96th Academy Awards and in the midst of printing labels for Oscars party dishes like “J. Robert Poppenheimers” and “Berry Bowlligan”, I sat down with some friends for a last-minute cram sesh watch of Maestro. Bradley Cooper’s sophomore feature was my last Best Picture blindspot, despite being the easiest to watch of all the nominees1. I missed my chance to catch it in theaters, and once it landed on Netflix, each lukewarm appraisal that popped up in my Letterboxd feed caused it to slip farther down my queue. I kept telling myself I’d get to it eventually, but once the Criterion Channel added new collections for Parker Posey AND Barbara Stanwyck, it was game over. But now that I have finally, belatedly watched Maestro, my verdict is: all of you need to grow up and chill out about Bradley Cooper.
Now, obviously, this very successful grown man does not need me to defend him, and this is not about defending him. It’s about defending the concept of Being Normal online. Does Bradley Cooper want an Oscar really badly? Yes. Would I also go a little insane if I gave the best performance of my life and lost to Rami Malek’s fake teeth? Almost certainly. I don’t think viewing movies through the lens of “is this person doing this for an Oscar?” is particularly productive because 1) it does not actually tell you anything about the movie itself, and 2) the answer is yes probably far less often than you’d think. I had a conversation after watching Napoleon where I tried to explain the ways I think the movie fell short, and the person I was talking to replied, “Well, sounds like they just did it to win some Oscars.” Ridley Scott does not spend $100 million blowing stuff up to win an Oscar. He does it to prove that he’ll never die.
Bradley Cooper has his own, no less strange reasons for doing the things that he does, but he’s not actually throwing shade at Cillian Murphy and he’s not actually making whatever face you think he’s making in some awards show cutaway and okay yes the walking around the house naked thing is weird I guess but only in like a garden-variety celebrity interview kind of way. Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard got away with saying they rarely bathe their kids, and they didn’t even make A Star is Born. I think the reason why Cooper inspires such a disproportionate response from people is that they don’t really know how to react when someone visibly cares about doing their job well. A decade of “movie too long” jokes at the Oscars has rendered us incapable of processing sincerity, and we see people who take their work seriously as taking themselves seriously, even when that’s not the case. In that respect, Cooper reminds me a lot of Jeremy Strong, another actor whose love of discussing the creative process renders people incapable of acting right. But whereas Strong quotes Robert Frost and Kierkegaard, Cooper quotes Robert De Niro and Sean Penn2. It’s like a nesting doll of talking about the work, and I can understand why people might find it a little much. I’m sure he can too. By his own admission, he is a crazy cinephile. In fact, I don’t think he wants recognition for making movies as much as he wants it for loving them.
To the extent that Maestro is an awards play, it is a lot less craven than something like, say, The Theory of Everything. Yes, like that movie, this is a biopic of a beloved, tortured genius, full of Actors Acting. But more importantly, it’s also a secret second genre: a handsomely-mounted, extravagant melodrama where a true believer madman puts it all on the line because he believes so fully in The Concept Of Love. One of these genres is like catnip to the Academy, while the other once permanently killed Francis Ford Coppola’s streak as their favorite director. Cooper melds the two genres together in ways so insane and baffling that I’m frankly very disappointed in everyone who undersold just how *weird* it is by writing it off as mere Oscar-bait.
As a capital-P Production, Maestro leaves very little to be desired. Matthew Libatique’s colors really pop in the film’s color section, and he finds striking ways for light to filter in through windows or doorways in the black-and white portion. I was consistently delighted by the ways Michelle Tesoro transitioned from scene to scene, particularly in the film’s early sections, which feel a little bit more detached from reality in their structure3. And the sets are full of impeccable period detail. This is also a movie where Bradley Cooper tells a baby that he had sex with both of its parents and then apologizes by saying “I love too much, what can I say? But I’m reining it in!” with a cadence and facial expression that can only be described as Trumpian. But enough about the stuff that works.
The two lead performances, while strong, feel very mannered underneath all the makeup and Voices. Cooper and Mulligan clearly did their research, but their work is studied to the point that there’s never any risk of spontaneity or danger. The overlapping dialogue could offset that feeling by adding a little looseness, but it mostly comes across like they wanted to do screwball banter and accidentally forgot to write any of the jokes. I could feel my brain being tricked by their cadence into thinking it heard something funny, and eventually, the effort of trying to parse their conversations for any sort of normal human sentiment produced an effect somewhat similar to my brain being slowly deprived of oxygen. Also, Sarah Silverman is there, distractingly cementing her place as the latest graduate from The Chris Rock School For Comedians Who Swear They Can Give A Good Serious Performance If You Just Cast Them One More Time, Please.
The film’s biggest issue, as others have noted, is that you walk away feeling like you didn’t learn much about Leonard Bernstein, both as a historical figure and also just as a character in the film Maestro. There’s an argument scene between Cooper and Mulligan about three-quarters of the way through the film where they say all the things they have been holding back, in what is clearly meant to be the culmination of what we have seen so far but instead just left me thinking, “Wow…I did not get any of that.” It’s fine for a biopic not to show every major accomplishment from a person’s life. That’s why we read biographies (okay, Wikipedia pages). But this is not that. For as much as I enjoyed the way Maestro moved from scene to scene, when you pull back and look at it as a whole, it’s pretty shapeless. It’s not like Napoleon though, where I got to the text at the end of the movie and thought, “That’s what you wanted the movie to be about??”4 I know that Bradley Cooper cares deeply about Leonard Bernstein. I know this because he told everyone who would listen that he spent six years learning to conduct like Leonard Bernstein. And despite, all the naysayers, I believe him. Or rather, even if I didn’t believe it, I believe that he believes it, so it might as well be true. You don’t get a movie like this unless someone spent way too long thinking about it. Because the movie doesn’t lack a point-of-view. It’s overwhelmed by one.
In a vacuum, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with Cooper directing and writing and producing and starring in the movie himself, although I do think it’s funny that he put Carey Mulligan’s name first in the credits to try and throw us off the scent. If vanity was a disqualifying trait in an artist, then there would be, like, five people left working at Cooper’s level. But I am interested in the way vanity manifests itself in an artist’s work. In the roles that he chooses for himself, Cooper is not afraid of looking bad, just as long as he’s being looked at. This unflinching vulnerability is more apparent (and quite effective) in A Star is Born because his character’s failings are rooted in a recognizable emotional arc, rather than a collection of disparate events. It’s been noted that there are parallels between Jackson Maine’s arc and Cooper’s own past, and I genuinely admire his fearlessness in pulling from those moments to create such a restrained, empathetic portrayal of behavior that normally lends itself to showing off. And not to be glib, but he’s clearly…ahem, working through some stuff as Bernstein, too. So the issue isn’t vanity. I honestly just think that he cares so much about Leonard Bernstein that he forgot that other people might not feel the same way and that he’d need to fill in some gaps for them.
The script is technically attributed to Cooper and Josh Singer, but Singer wrote his first draft years before Cooper boarded the project (and opted for a page-one rewrite). No matter how collaborative that rewriting process was, the movie definitely suffers from some tunnel vision on Cooper’s part. Focusing on Bernstein’s marriage instead of his career is a valid choice, but not providing enough context about the latter ultimately harms the portrayal of the former. By not giving us more of a sense of Lenny and Felicia’s relationships to their respective work, many of their scenes feel like treatises on love and sacrifice in a general sense, rather than viewpoints wedded to the experiences of this specific couple. I think the movie would have benefitted from an outside perspective to help Cooper get out of his own way a bit and clarify what he really wanted to say. As it stands, there’s still a lot to recommend this movie, and even 1,000 words in, I still don’t feel like I’ve fully done justice to its inspired lunacy. Yes, it’s another entry in a genre the Oscars adore, but it’s a movie that takes real risks. He knows how the Oscars feel about franchise fare and he made a prequel to TÁR anyway! Joking aside, I’ll take a fascinating misfire over bland competence any day, and that this movie deserves to be remembered as more than just “the big loser on Oscars night.”5
So what should Cooper do next? Ideally, this would be a question with two separate answers: one for Cooper the actor, and one for Cooper the director. However, as I was in the process of writing this article, I opened Twitter, found out that Bradley Cooper has just cast Bradley Cooper in his next movie, and thought “Well what even is the point” before proceeding to leave this Google doc unopened for four days. Nevertheless! After the next one, I think he would be well-served (as an actor and as a director) by not trying to do everything himself for a while. I guess you could say he needs to be REINING IT IN! (Sorry.)
Why, you ask? Well, for starters, he’s just not on screen enough for my liking. In the five years between A Star is Born, Cooper only appeared in a major on-screen role three times. Two of those were supporting roles in The Mule and Licorice Pizza. I have not seen The Mule, but I have seen John Mulaney and Pete Davidson’s recap on SNL, and they do not mention Cooper in it at all, so I assume he is less integral to the movie than Andy Garcia and the concept of threesomes, both of which get mentioned multiple times. His performance as Hollywood producer Jon Peters in Licorice Pizza, however, was a scene-stealing tour-de-force that mined his focused, meticulous energy to great comedic effect (just think of the way he repeatedly enunciates “Strei-sand”) and allowed him to finally flash that manic glint in his eye he usually keeps hidden away. The real Peters clawed his way to the top of Hollywood through sheer charm and determination, and once he got there, he just kept pushing until he got everything he wanted, including producing a remake of A Star is Born. You could read Cooper’s performance as leaning into a funhouse mirror nightmare version of the acclaim-chasing striver that some people see him as. As if to say, “You think I’m crazy? I could be so much worse.” But even without the meta element, it’s a singular performance that none of his contemporaries could have given.
I can’t necessarily say the same for his other 2021 performance, as the lead of Guillermo del Toro’s Nightmare Alley. Cooper is good, but…miscast? Or rather, not cast with intention. Del Toro cast Cooper in the role after Leonardo DiCaprio dropped out, and knowing that information going in helped me identify the issue with his performance. The role requires a certain element of mystery, but it’s often hard to tell if Cooper is being deliberately withholding or if there just isn’t much there, almost as if he’s tentatively deciding how to fill in a template designed for a different presence. It’s not the first time comparisons have been made between the two actors, but to paraphrase Patrick Fugit in Almost Famous, he shouldn't try to be Leo. He should just be himself. It’s a lesson that Joaquin and Christian Bale had to learn at one point too, and it has served both of their careers well.
Despite his career longevity and level of acclaim, Cooper’s star persona is still relatively undefined compared to the actors I just mentioned. Before A Star is Born, the only major directors on his resume were Clint Eastwood, Cameron Crowe, and David O. Russell6. His most iconic character was a voice-over performance, and a very different voice from his own, at that. And until around 2015, these highlights were sprinkled in between thankless roles in titles as forgettable as The Words and as unfortunately memorable as The Midnight Meat Train. In a recent interview on Smartless, Cooper said that the directors he wanted to work with didn’t want to work with him, but he “wanted to be at the center of the creative process”, so he turned to self-directing to create those opportunities. Okay, well done, point proven and you got a PTA and a del Toro role out of it. But now he’s spending so long on his own directorial efforts that he doesn’t have any room in his schedule to star in other people’s projects. I promise they’ll cast you now if you give them a chance! They all saw A Star is Born! (and if they didn’t, they sat there while you and Gaga did the live show at the Oscars and wondered if they should give you two the room.) So, what kind of roles do I think he should be pursuing? I have a few ideas.
My first suggestion is a no-brainer. Bradley Cooper is currently addicted to reminding famous directors of the times they didn’t cast him and then crying in front of them about it. To those directors, I would simply say…you should cast him now! Why not? Have a little fun! It’d make him feel good. People like seeing him. Everybody wins. Spike is currently working on his High and Low remake with Denzel (and Cooper’s regular DP Matthew Libatique). I could totally see Cooper filling the Willem-Dafoe-in-Inside-Man role of “cop who tries to big dog Denzel and then immediately regrets it because, c’mon, he’s Denzel.” And honestly, Asshole Cop works for Mann, too. Surely he needs one of those for Heat 2. Let him go face to face with Austin Butler in a battle of Guys-who-paid-their-dues-in-network-TV-to-get-here.
One of Cooper’s best traits as an actor is the way he can strip down his movie star image without resorting to a full-on transformation, the way many other A-listers do when they want to prove they can still play a normal person. He knows how to complicate his appeal without shedding it entirely, and I would love to see him embrace more dirtbag roles. He can be the eroding beauty, the charismatic dipshit, the born loser who you can’t help but root for anyway. He’s got enough charm to sell you something and enough sleaze to make you feel guilty for buying it. I want to see him as a gambler or a lawyer with a guilty conscience, or really just anyone who is in over their head. He should be sweaty and scrappy and always a little bit on the edge. I want him to have his Glengarry Glen Ross or his California Split. In many ways, I suppose the type of character I’m describing is not unlike a human Rocket Raccoon. Which, by the way, have you guys seen his cameo on Abbott Elementary where he does the Rocket Raccoon voice? It’s genuinely so crazy that that voice comes out of his mouth. Like I saw it with my own two eyes and I felt just as unsettled as when all other Bene Gesserit voices come out of Rebecca Ferguson’s mouth in Dune: Part Two. So, okay, maybe he doesn’t do the voice, but I want him to be able to bring the spirit of his Rocket Raccoon performance to some of his live-action roles.
The Abbott Elementary cameo also reminded me that, despite what people have decided based on their made-up version of him, Bradley Cooper loves making fun of himself. He’s always down to get a little bit silly! He’s one of the funniest parts of Wet Hot American Summer, a movie that features no less than seven of the funniest people on the planet7 (and which was his first movie ever.) He’s one of the funniest parts of the Wet Hot prequel series, which he filmed on his off days from doing Elephant Man on Broadway. And even though he’s not in the sequel series, the way that he isn’t in it is still one of the funniest things about it! Obviously, he’s been in other comedies. He worked his way up through douchey boyfriend parts in movies like Wedding Crashers before finally leading the Hangover trilogy. But it’s been a while since he’s been able to get truly goofy. Hollywood has forced him to REIN IT IN to be taken seriously as a leading man, but I want someone to give him the opportunity to let loose, since I don’t know that he’ll give it to himself. His next directorial effort is called “Is This Thing On?”, which sounds like it could be about a comedian. But movies and TV shows about comedians are never actually about comedy anymore. They’re about depression. Someone should put him in a screwball comedy, if anyone even really makes those anymore. Perhaps with fellow Philly native Da’vine Joy Randolph? Or maybe a buddy comedy where he’s the wild card and someone else is the straight man for a change! Maybe John C. Reilly? That could be a fun pairing. The problem is, every big comedy movie now also has to be an action movie, and that’s not really what I want for him, though I’m sure he’d be good in it. I would love to see him work with a director like Lorene Scafaria, who knows how to mix comedy and earnestness in a way that would suit Cooper’s whole deal, or Marielle Heller, who directed two of the great “Oh that’s right, this person is really good at their job” movie star performances of the last decade by taking what we love about those stars and putting them in a new context where those strengths are tested8.
As for Cooper’s own directorial projects, I’ve thought a lot about where he could go next in exploring the themes he’s interested in (love, the pressures of fame, being Bradley Cooper). Both of his movies so far were based on pre-existing material (a weird but technically true way of saying “someone’s real life” in the case of Maestro), and I’m excited to see what an original, from-scratch Bradley Cooper script looks like. But not yet. First, I think he should embrace the tried-and-true method of a gun-for-hire era. At worst, a for-hire job will leave you going “he directed this?” or “that’s what happened to the District 9 guy?” when you see a trailer for a crappy movie. But at best, it can be a fruitful way for artists to hone their craft and develop new techniques without the pressures and risks that come with a movie that, y’know, you actually care about. After The King of Comedy was declared “the flop of the year” and he couldn’t get The Last Temptation of Christ made, Martin Scorsese directed After Hours and The Color of Money. While they were initially regarded as minor entries in his filmography (though luckily that is no longer the case), they also marked the beginning of his collaboration with Michael Ballhaus. And without the camera techniques they developed on those for-hire projects, we wouldn’t have Goodfellas as we know it today. Inside Man revitalized Spike Lee’s career after a series of flops, and it allowed him to inject some of his signature shots and themes into an otherwise fairly standard heist narrative, thereby creating one of the best modern entries in the genre. Damien Chazelle decided to flip the script by doing a for-hire movie and then doing his big flop, but still, the principle mostly holds true.
I would love to see Cooper direct a lean thriller, or something of that nature. Some of the best moments in Maestro come from the camera cornering the characters in these really tight spaces, like when Lenny and Felicia first meet at a party and it almost feels like we are spying on them through the camera. The most famous line in Cooper’s whole (two film) oeuvre is “I just wanted to take another look at you.” Assuming he is able to work with Libatique again, I think the two of them could make something special by turning that leering quality into a textual part of the movie. And there’s so many kinds of thrillers to choose from: a conspiracy thriller, a psychological thriller, an erotic thriller (well, actually, maybe not). I just want him to try some new stuff out without any goals loftier than just making a fun genre exercise. Maybe take a page out of your old mentor Clint’s book. Run a two-take set and get everyone home by five for dinner. It’s okay if doesn’t get nominated for any Oscars. Scorsese has been nominated for Best Director 10 times, but that also means he hasn’t been nominated 17 times. Plus, once you have been nominated, any time you aren’t nominated, at least a few people will bemoan the fact that you were snubbed. Even if the movie you made is as awards-unfriendly as The Killer. Cooper should use this to his advantage and do some real sicko shit.
For all I know, maybe that’s what he has in mind with the movie he just announced. All we know is that it’s called Is This Thing On?, and Cooper will star in it alongside Will Arnett, who also co-wrote the script. I think that Arnett is a perfect co-star for Cooper for a few reasons. One, they’ve apparently been close pals for twenty years, so it’s just nice to see them working together. Two, Cooper always seems to steal the voice of one person on set for each of his movies (Sam Elliott in A Star is Born, presumably somebody with a head cold in Maestro), and you really can’t do much better than Arnett’s voice. Can you imagine two guys talking like that? It’d be like this scene from 30 Rock. And three, I mean this in the nicest possible way, but nobody has ever accused Will Arnett of trying to win an Oscar. I really hope that this is just a solid little dramedy made by two friends who want to work together, and that it’ll show people Bradley Cooper doesn’t make movies for Oscars. He makes them for Bradley Cooper. And I hope he keeps it that way for a long time.
This was the first year where I actually watched all ten nominees before the ceremony, as opposed to just 7 or 8, largely thanks to the Oscars’ bold strategy of actually picking 10 good movies this time. I got pretty close two years ago, but my Belfast watch has an asterisk next to it since I was just watching it play on the seat-back screen of the guy next to me on an airplane while I desperately tried not to focus on how badly I needed to pee.
Also, frankly, Jeremy Strong just has more of a “chill vibe.”
Not that the movie needed any more categories to lose in, but I would have given it Poor Things’ editing nomination.
Sorry that I keep taking shots at Napoleon, it just seems like an apt comparison point.
The big winner is, of course, Timothy Busfield for getting mentioned in John Mulaney’s presenter speech despite not having appeared in a movie in over ten years.
*I* don’t think of him as a major director, but Hollywood definitely did during that stretch of time.
Janeane Garofalo, David Hyde Pierce, Amy Poehler, Paul Rudd, Christopher Meloni, Molly Shannon, and OF COURSE The God Ken Marino. Sorry to Elizabeth Banks.
Melissa McCarthy in Can You Ever Forgive Me? and Tom Hanks in A Beautiful Day In The Neighborhood